Please share your first response before reading the hidden notes below. The photographer is looking for an unbiased initial impression.
Feedback Focus: Artistic / Expressive
Questions for Viewers
Here are some questions on my mind that I would like to know from viewers:
How do your eyes move about the image?
What comes to mind first when you look at this frame for a couple of seconds?
Does the brightness of the head in the lower left distract or become part of the story?
Is there a story that jumps off the frame for you, and what is it?
About This Image
Ok here is my debut in the image critique forum. No pressure…
This is one of those images where I just know too much of the story, which leaves me uncertain about how others will react to it. I guess you could say that about many images, but with some it’s more of a problem than others. I would be curious about your first impression when you look at it. Story will come later, if there is interest.
Thank you in advance for taking the time to add your feedback!
Technical Details
Cropped marginally, with standard edits applied. I am aware of a distracting light area on lower left edge that I may darken. The main editing question in my mind is about the tortoise head in lower left, which, depending on how it is handled, contributes differently to the overall image and story. In other words, darkening it would put more emphasis on the individual in the background, brightening it makes them compete for attention (ping pong for your eyes).
First, Welcome! No pressure. I hate being first critiquerer.
First impression: Holy Cow!!
My eyes straight away go to the tortoise in the upper right, then to the lower left.
What comes to mind straight up? I know I am looking at tortoises, but in such an artful, abstract way. It took me some seconds to work out that the lighter shell of the lower was actually his/her shell and not a giant talon or claw.
The lower left becomes quickly a part of the story and not a distraction. I might consider lowering the brightness on the far left of his/her face…which also looks quite “skull” like.
Now that I’ve studied the image thoughtfully (and your title) I’m assuming this is either mating or territorial behaviour.
Wonderfully seen, captured and processed. This is an image that is museum-worthy.
As presented it is wonderful
The sharpest focus and lightest area is the head of the following tortoise.
This area holds my eye well and it doesn’t really get pulled anywhere, except to explore the slightly lighter edge of the shell of the front tortoise.
The area of comprehension and exploration gradually extends from the RUC to explore the whole of the image but is kept in the frame by the dark edge and vignette.
It is a truly masterly composition - POV low down as it needs to be.
Really really works, well titled and does indeed need to on the wall of a natural history exhibition
Well done indeed
Steffen, welcome to NPN! It took me a bit of looking to realize that the “big bright wing” crossing the middle was, in fact, the shell of the front tortise. Your approach make for a very intriguing, somewhat scary view. That sharp head looming out of the darkness at the back seems quite ominous.
Steffen: Let me add my welcome to NPN and thanks for such an intriguing and captivating image. At first I was really unsure about what I was looking at. My brain initially thought the OOF tortoise was in the BG since we often expect DOF fall off behind the subject. I also had no clue what the OOF arch was. Now that I see correctly it all makes sense and the understanding makes it even more compelling.
Remaining questions are, is the pursuing tortoise much bigger than the other and what is the stuff in the ULC? Since it’s closer to the focal plane of the pursuer I’m having a hard time identifying it as part of him. The only other problem I have with this marvelous creation is that you’ve set a really high standard for yourself and you’ve certainly elevated the quality of the site with this post. >=))>
PS: By all means share the story. Inquiring minds want to know.
Welcome to NPN and this is a good one. Comp and lighting are wonderful and I like the sharp tortoise head in the upper RH corner. My eyes quickly go for the in focus area first and then pick up the complete story behind the photo when I view the remaining elements. I think that this is fine as presented. Awesome shot…Jim
Oh wow is my first impression. Great story unfolding here and well captured. The image quickly came together to my eye. Great critical sharpness on the pursuing tortoise. My thoughts were a mating pursuit or a territorial encounter. Well done image.
Welcome @steffen-foerster! This is a wonderful first image to share in the critique forum. To answer your questions:
I immediately lock on the upper right tortoise head, then the mysterious dividing claw/shell, and then the lower left tortoise face.
My initial impression was that this felt like an album cover of a band. I know that seems unusual as a first impression, but it’s the graphic quality, the faces (more than one and a kind of prioritizing of the lead singer) and color palette. It’s like the album cover for Queen II. But of course, not, as it’s tortoises. Still, the cover gives us a sense of a group with a story.
The left head definitiely becomes part of the story, especially when we realize the dominant shape in the image is the shell of the “background, less focused” tortoise.
No specific story for me, just curiosity and wonder.
Looking forward to other’s thoughts and the story, if you share it.
ML
Thank you Glenys for this thoughtful feedback! And I agree I think that left side of the face could be toned down a little, that’s a great catch. I am so glad it took you just a few seconds to make sense of it.
This is indeed Galápagos giant tortoises mating behavior, played out in the highlands of Santa Cruz. Males are much larger than females, and during the mating season they can get quite rowdy in their pursuits. Not every female is receptive to their approaches, but the only chance to avoid them is to “run” away. Which is exactly what is happening in this image. At first, the male was inconspicuously meandering ever so slowly in the direction of the female, one slow step and a lot of munching at a time. But eventually he broke into a “sprint” and the female dashed out of there as fast as she could. Which means slowly, but faster than the 500 pound male. I think “Terror” might also be an adequate caption for this image.
Thank you Huw, I am so glad you enjoyed this image and I enjoyed reading your analysis of it. I especially appreciate your detailed description of how your eyes explored different parts of the frame. Super helpful
Thank you Mark! And thanks for sharing your analysis. That’s exactly the kind of feedback I was looking for. As long as it didn’t take too long to figure out, that is good to know. Ominous indeed and that is part of the story, see above. So glad that jumped out to you as well.
Thank you Bill, this is another very useful analysis. There is a version of this where the shell of the pursuing male can be seen over its head so that association may be more obvious, the downside would be the loss of symmetry in the opposing corners. It is something I may play around with a little more. Shared the story in my first response, albeit short. The actual capture wasn’t trivial and despite shooting with 30 fps there were only a couple of frames with the desired effect. Lot of head movement as these giants haul themselves about. Thank you again for your appreciation!
Thank you, Marylynne. I like the album cover idea, there must be a band for which this is suitable, ha! What strikes me that many viewers do take a bit of time deciphering the dividing shell that is out of focus, the shell of the female in front. That is exactly why feedback like this is so valuable, for me that question does not come up in my mind as I am still in the moment and completing the frame in my head exactly as it happened. Much thanks!
It’s a killer image ! My first reaction was it’s from another planet.
I agree that toning down the bottom tortoise. may help improve it further. You may add a touch more canvas on top, about same distance as the bottom edge from the lower tortoise.
